chase the light

Oooo look, one of the survivors from the XPan rolls! I’m glad one of these came out actually. This is a log processing area in Coos Bay, Oregon. More on that later.

Today’s drive was not fun. I was tired of not being south of Portland yet so I said I’d try to get across the California border today. Turns out, not a lot of interesting things from Tillamook to Crescent City. First bit of business though is to get to the Tillamook Creamery and hit up the tour. I checked out of the axolotl motel and arrived at the factory in about 3 minutes. That’s how big Tillamook is. I was pretty gung ho to try their grilled cheese and go on the tour. Turns out the gift shop is the best part of the whole experience. Lots of fun branded products and mostly not A.I. stickers. They had a small “museum” of early years products which had some amazing design. Go with that you fools. I finally went upstairs for the tour and what? It’s just a bunch of windows looking down into a sectioned off part of the factory with a few people doing some things. Like every morning they draw straws as to who is going into this fishbowl. All you do is read the informational sign and then walk to the next window. This is not a tour. Boo on you Tillamook. Lame. I read about two of them and then just left for the café area. So yes, let’s check out this café and it’s uh-mazing grilled cheese sandwich. Well I saw someone walk by with said sandwich and it was so tiny and anemic there was no way I was paying $20 for that. So I got a breakfast burrito and it was the size of a fat hot dog. What is this? A burrito for ants? So overall I give the Tillamook Creamery and factory tour 1 cheese curd out of 5. Visit the gift shop then keep driving.

Well that was a lot of complaining so onward we go. Somewhere along the line I saw an airplane sticking out the side of a building so I thought heck yeah, let’s stop. It turns out the inside the cockpit is Robert’s office. Ya know the one who owns the book shop and has his own parking space? This bookshop was beyond nuts. I can’t really describe so a video is better.

Moving on, the next stop Depoe Bay! Why? Because movies, that’s why. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest to be exact. If it’s been awhile you might not remember that all the patients take a boat trip. They set of from this tiniest of harbours that the city promotes as “the world’s smallest navigable harbor”. According to the good people of Depoe Bay but who the hell knows. It is small though and I kinda loved it. About 5 miles south I hit up the Devils Punchbowl. Future Oregon travelers, don’t bother. I got a clam chowder in a sourdough bowl which I think was supposed to represent the Devils Punchbowl by shape or something. Dumb connection and it wasn’t very good. Oof it’s getting late and I’m nowhere near where I need to be so next stop Coos Bay. If I had not wanted to get to California I probably would have stayed in Coos Bay. And maybe at the motel with all the sci-fi murals but I also spotted the aaaaamaxing Egyptian Theatre. Much to my surprise on the schedule this month is a screening of Dinosaur! Way to go scheduler person at the Egyptian Theatre in Coos Bay. Next time give me a call I’ll do a talk about how that film spent four years in production and how over budget it went. I secretly still think it’s the most expensive movie ever made. Oh yes, logs. The first thing I saw coming into town was the above log processing area. It was very quiet out and I felt like I was doing something wrong taking pictures of logging but ya know public street and all, logs, stacked, cool looking. Please leave me alone 40 year old weirdo riding his bike around in circles on this deserted street. I swear to God I’ll bludgeon you with this camera. This, this… already broken camera.

Further south on the “Persian Gulf, Afghanistan, Iraq Veterans Memorial Highway” (I shit you not, look it up) I started to head inland just as the sun was setting so I pulled over. The whole 101 Oregon highway from the Washington border to the California border is called that. AKA The Oregon Coast Hwy as it’s more commonly called.

I’m so freaking bored of driving. At this point I just kept my foot on the gas until I arrived in Crescent City, California. Hell-a-fookin-knew-ya. I’m also south of Portland! Anyway what a long ass day so what better treat than a late night visit to a grocery store. Safeway, you’re up. And guess what?!? It’s-It ice cream sandwiches! You know you’re in California when that’s in stock. I was only window shopping though and ready to rest my head at the Bay View Inn that has “reasonable rates and walk in specials” according to the sign. No axolotls though. Now that you read the ramblings view my visual documentation below and relive the boring part of the Oregon Coast.

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